Dean's World

Am I talking about the newest attempt of the left to take away our 2nd Amendment rights?

Nope.

I'm talking about the latest attempt of the right to infringe upon our 1st Amendment rights.

Where is this battle taking place? A little known video game called Mass Effect. It may ring a bell for some of you here because I've talked about it recently. It's a fantastic RPG for the Xbox 360. It's one of the reasons I own a 360.

And now some idiot conservative is using it in his crusade against the 1st Amendment. And what bugs me most isn't that I think he's wrong, or misguided, or just plain dumb. No. What bugs me most is that he is flat-out lying. Here, read this tool's words yourself.

If you've played the game, you know how full of it this guy is. And you should also realize there's no way he could simply be mistaken. He's says things that are completely false. He points to the blue sky and tells us it's green when he knows for a fact it's blue.

But, as a service for those that have not played the game, I will go through this piece of journalistic trash for you.

It's called "Mass Effect" and it allows its players - universally male no doubt - to engage in the most realistic sex acts ever conceived.

First, the man is sexist. "Universally male?" Where's his data? And so what if he's right? That has no bearing whatsoever on the argument at hand unless he's saying male gamers share blame with BioWare (the makers of the game). As for realistic sex: No. I'm sorry but he's wrong. Pop in God of War. You actually get to see breasts in all their glory in that one. Is there sex in Mass Effect? Yep. There is. Is it realistic? I think it's plain to see that by "realistic" the writer means "graphic." And it's not. In fact, it's quite tame by any standard. Bare backsides, hugging, I think there was a hand on some steamed glass once.

Nothing you can't find on television.

Starting with the disgusting idea that one can "create" their own versions of what people look like, removing warts, moles, and bald spots while enhancing - shall we say - the extended features of the game's characters tends to objectify women, sex, and human relationships. Right? We can all agree on this?

No we can not agree!

And the process that he is so disgusted with is called character creation. And I'd think a sane person wouldn't have a problem with it. Except this man isn't sane. If I want to play a short, bald, fat man I can. If I want to make an object of sex I can. If I want to make an average joe I can. If I want to play a female I can. If I want to play a male I can (and I did). The writer of this piece seems to think gamers are only sex obsessed pre-teen males. Well, if he actually even looked at the box he'd see this game has an "M" rating. That means it's not supposed to be played by anyone under 17 anyway.

Then there's the dishonesty behind the game' title. "Mass Effect" sounds like a war game with a deadly virus that is spreading unless the GI-Joes are able to defeat the evil and deadly substance and it's covert war plan.

Dishonesty!? What the blankity-blank-blank-blankity-blank are you talking about? The game isn't called Rainbow Pony Shining Adventure in Chocolate River Land! And that this waste of human space draws any conclusions about what the title means is his own problem. Maybe if he read the back of the game's box he might be a little better educated.

By it's design, kids could ask for it, or for their parents' Best Buy Card to go purchase it with nary a raised eye-brow. Generic, non-descriptive, and relatively harmless.

Kids could ask for a nail gun if they wanted to. Do you want to argue nail guns are designed for kids to use? And it's (OMFG!!!) the parent's responsibility to be the gatekeeper for everything that lands in little Timmy's little Xbox 360.

And the title, Mass Effect, is not non-descriptive. It describes a scientific phenomenon that exists within the game. I do not know if this is described on the back of the box. And, really, it doesn't need to be.

But it IS marketed for the X-Box 360, perhaps the most visually stimulating gaming system ever made. The software for such allows the blending of DVD video, component graphics, and the manipulation of actual pictures so that an alternate reality engulfs the fifteen year old boy playing it without much objection.

I'd say the PS3 is more visually stimulating, but as this guy doesn't know anything about the game he's talking about I don't expect him to know anything about the console hardware either.

And why is a 15 year old playing Mass Effect? I just told you it's clearly marked for 17+.

Now if I have trouble with my son taking his James Bond 007 games a little too emotionally, imagine the powerful effect that hormones add to the mix when the player's own character is copulating like jack rabbits with super-models, actresses, and anyone else they can spend the patience to create, name, and "put into play."

Why is you son's emotional immaturity my problem?

And copulating like jack-rabbits? Where the hell is that in the game because I missed it!

The player can only have sex twice in the game. Again, both times are very, very tame and one of those times is only at the conclusion of persuing a romantic relationship with an NPC (non-player character). So, for that second jump in the hay, you're looking at some 20+ hours of persuit. Not exactly a sex-on-demand game, is it?

If a pre-teen, teen, young adult, or adult male plays such a game in which the women DO submit without choice, are made to appear as Barbie streetwalkers, and perform whatever act can be imagined, what's to stop that same male from assuming that the women in his "other world" shouldn't be forced to do the same.

You frakin' liar. You are a liar and should have your opinion page yanked. Never once in the game can you make any NPC do anything it doesn't want to do. Hell, you can't even get your own character to do whatever you want them to do! And, again, the two possible sex acts do not occur whenever the player likes. If someone comes away from Mass Effect thinking they can get women to do whatever they want whenever they want, they came to the game with those problems in the first place.

And because of the digital chip age in which we live - "Mass Effect" can be customized to sodomize whatever, whoever, however, the game player wishes.

NO IT CANNOT! You stinking liar!

Really, you have no idea how mad this makes me. I love video games. I want to make a living creating them. And to see a fantastic game smeared by some pathetic knuckle-dragging baboon sickens me. Not because he said it. But because there are people out there that will listend to him and never have the oppertunity to see the deceptive twit for what he really is.

I don't know if anyone that reads this blog lives in the Detroit area. Or, for that matter, if any of those that do listen to WMUZ, 103.5 on the FM dial. If you do, you're probably familiar with Mr. Bob Dutko. He's probably the most popular conservative Christian radio personality in the area.

I started listening to him a few years back because, well, I didn't know any better. Since then I've discovered that the man isn't as intellectually deep as he believes he is and often opines on topics he knows nothing about.

For example: Mass Effect.

I wrote earlier about the article on Townhall about that game and, it would appear, NewsMax repeated the lies and Mr. Dutko took it up as Gospel.

I only heard Bob Dutko talk about because a co-worker listens the the show and was there to hear me rant about the Townhall article. Foolishly I believed that Bob was as open to rational debate as he accused so many of his detractors as not being. Every Friday he spends his last hour taking listener calls, so I called him.

He did not disappoint. He's as misinformed, biased, and illogical as he claims those that don't agree with his point of view are.

Firstly, this man knows nothing about popular culture. Ironically, he sure does have an opinion about every aspect of it. I hoped he wasn't one of those baby boomers that thought only children play video games. I hoped he actually looked at who really played games and who bought games because that's what a person of logic would do if they believed or espoused sweeping claims about the gaming culture. In my heart I knew it wasn't going to be the case but I'm willing to assume the best of anyone until they prove me wrong.

Bob Dutko proved me wrong.

He had no problem taking the Townhall article as Gospel because it reinforced his willfully ignorant view of popular media, and video games specifically.

When I called him I was calm, articulate and to the point. It seemed that Bob's hangup was that there was any sex at all in Mass Effect, no matter how tame. As the conversation broke down (he wanted me to describe in detail what was exactly to be seen and I couldn't because the scenes were so short and so innocuous that nothing stuck with me) it became clear to me that Bob falsely believed video games were only purchased and played by teens.

Well, that's not exactly correct. He kept saying teens over and over but made a slip and let the word children out. I didn't let it go. "Which is it, Bob? Are teens or children playing these games?" He told me to stop cutting him off. Something he has no problem doing when he feels he has a point. Neither did he feel the need to clarify if he really meant children or teens or if he felt teens were children (something the ESRB doesn't feel at all).

Bob even went so far as to claim that the makers of rated "M" games are making games with the full knowledge that "teens" (remember that's code for "children") are going to play them. I asked Bob how he could possibly know that and he didn't answer. It seemed to me that he was indicating that these developers wanted children to play them.

I pointed out to Bob the consoles and games were really quite expensive so it's probable that parents were buying them for their children and, in the end, it's the parent's responsibility to look at what their children are playing. Again, no response. Just more ranting that only teens (again, he means "children") play games and that the makers of rated "M" games are targeting these players specifically.

In fact, he went so far as to say, "If we were to look I bet you we'd see only teens play video games!" I knew this was a complete delusion on his part. I told him that, no, most gamers were adults and that the kids that grew up with Atari and the original Nintendo have grown up and are still playing games.

In the end, he told me that if I wanted explicit sex I should buy a Playboy and then hung up on me. A bit of a strange thing for a conservative Christian to say to another, don't you think? Buy Playboy? Maybe I should get a subscription and sent it to him, thanking him for his suggestion?

Bob's entire delusion is built upon the fantasy that most gamers are children. And that game developers target children specifically for their wares. Being a proud member of the gaming sub-culture I know he was full of it. But, I did research anyway. And guess what I found?

1. The average gamer age is 33.
2. 83% of those that purchase console games are 18+.
3. The average age of a game buyer is 40.
4. 69% of heads of households play video games.

Further, a 2005 study shows:

1. Only 16% of all games sold are rated "M".
2. RPGs (which Mass Effect is) are the second least popular game genre (9% of total sales) only higher than fighting games (5.4%).

So, what Bob Dutko would have us believe is that Bioware spent millions of dollars making a game for one of the least popular genres in gaming (RPGs), aiming for the lowest selling game rating (rated "M"), hoping to sell their game to just 17% of the game buying population, knowing that, "Parents are nearly always (92%) present when their kids purchase or rent video games and 87% of the time, kids receive their parent's permission before buying or renting a game."

This is what Bob Dutko and the other willfully ignorant pundits want us to believe.

I sent Bob the ESA study. I'm going to call him again on Friday and ask him about it. Because, unless he comes up with a study to counter this one (and I can't find one), he has no choice but to admit, on air, his opinion is based upon ignorance and he has nothing to logically defend his assertion that video games are played primarily by children.

Of course, he could bring the study itself into question. That it isn't trustworthy because it was published by an organization that exists to support the gaming industry. Which, he would have a point. Of course, I would be remiss if I didn't remind him that his own salary depends upon pushing forward a particular religious and political point of view and that if he were to, say, broadcast that the Bible is a book of lies he'd quickly find himself out of a job.

Such is the dangers of making a living off of talking about what you believe. The listening public doesn't know when you're just a talking head collecting a paycheck.

What horse?

The Mass Effect horse.

A friend of mine sent me the following link from Kotaku. It's EA's response to a Fox News segment about the game.

The segment is like watching a train wreck of stupidity. The guy from Spike TV did good for himself for the five seconds they had him on. But what really got me going was the panel discussion they had afterwards. You had every one there condemning the game yet not one of them played it. At least the host was honest enough to admit she only saw a few videos and those were not offensive!

I think what really sealed the deal for me was one of the 'experts' saying, "Whatever happened to Pac-Man?"

What happened? The world grew the frak up. It passed you by, little lady. Guess what? We have cars now too! Gone are the days of horse and buggy. And we've mastered fire since you last climbed out of your cave. You dumb twit.

Geeez! Why didn't they all simply admit they know nothing about the topic at hand, but they did all stay at a Holiday Inn Express last light?

Well, if you excuse me, I've got a space shuttle to pilot. I can't make a paper airplane stay in the air but, heck, if this set of losers are what pass for experts today, call me Chuck Yeager.

UPDATE:

Pennywit was kind enough to send me two articles. The first is from the New York Times. In it Cooper Lawrence recants her Fox News comments about the game. After she appeared on the show she sat down and watched someone play the game for a couple of hours. She saw nothing offensive in the game. As for the 'explicit sex scenes?' No more explicit than anything she's seen on Lost.

The second article is from the Dallas Morning News. The author of the article, Victor Godinez, simple reiterates a lot of what I've already said in the past three posts about this game. The sex isn't explicit. The game is intended for mature audiences. And the sexual content that is there isn't anything we'd bat an eye at should we have seen it on television or the movies.

But the larger point is that, if this were a movie or a book, we wouldn't be having this conversation. How many sex scenes does the average Oscar-winning movie or Pulitzer Prize-winning book contain? And are all those scenes absolutely, artistically critical, or, just maybe, are many of them gratuitous?

And yet, somehow, movie directors and book authors don't find themselves on the pointy end of an interrogator's lance for including sex scenes in their projects.

Indeed. Further:

Perhaps it's merely a matter of time before the current crop of television hosts and radio psychologists retires and a new generation of game-playing hosts and shrinks takes its place.

Here's lookin' at you, Bob Dutko.

Do I think the culture is over sexualized? Yes, I do. Sex is everywhere. And I'd support any effort to roll that back. But not at the expense of the truth. Mass Effect is not the enemy here guys. It really, really ain't.

To show there's no hard feelings, if anyone knows how to contact Bob Dutko, and I've tried numerous times, tell him Kevin D. from Westland would love to have him over and show him the game. Show him the content he compares to Playboy. That way, even if he disagrees with me still, it's from an informed position.