Message to Black America
Dean
I was born in 1966. I'll be 40 years old this year. I came up hard in a hard-scrabble life. I'll spare you the excruciating details; I'll just say when I was born I was my 16 year old mama's second child, and my daddy was 17 and working as a mail clerk. They split barely before I was out of diapers, and to make a long story short I left home at the age of 15 and have made my own way ever since, and have had to deal my whole life with people not respecting me. I got nothing but respect for those who come up from nothing and make something of themselves, and I have sympathy for those who are struggling but not quite making it. They don't deserve pity but they do deserve maybe a little sympathy and maybe occasionally a hand up--or a kick in the ass, depending. You know what I'm saying.
Also, I grew up among working class people both in El Paso, Texas, and also on the south side of Chicago. I saw lots and lots of racism up close and personal. There were lots of people I knew as a kid who didn't like Mexicans in Texas, and lots of people I knew as a kid who didn't like blacks in Chicago. Hell the Neo-Nazi Party of Illinois had its headquarters about three blocks from my house in Chicago. There were race-riots, more than one, in Marquette Park where I lived. Dr. King staged at least one protest there before he died. Jesse Jackson was a local boy we all knew before he made it big nationally.
I've also had the unfortunate experience of black and hispanic people not liking me because I was white. My lovely wife, born in Detroit in 1968 as the daughter of Polish immigrants during the worst race riots of that city's history, saw even more. She went to a mostly-black High School, and got her ass beat at least once for being white and the "descendants of slave owners," never mind the fact that her family were from solid peasant stock and escaped Communist oppression and came to this country barely speaking the language and being the subject of countless Polish jokes and all kinds of contempt. Her dad at points was collecting tin cans off the streets of Detroit to find money to feed his wife and kids.
Sometimes people wonder what my wife and I have in common. On the surface, we are very very different people. But at a fundamental level, we both understand certain things, and understand and respect each other. Would that all couples had that. Regardless, I can tell you one thing neither of us has a lot of respect for: whining and paranoia. (Mind you, maybe sometimes I whine more than she does. But that's a discussion for another day.)
I recently was forwarded the following email from a good and dear friend. At first I was taken aback. Maybe you've even seen it. It looks like this:
Voting Rights Act-Expires for blacks in 2007Below you will find a speech that Bill Cosby's wife gave at a function. Everyone please read this and pass it on to as many African Americans you come in contact with.
Camille Cosby just made a reference about the Voting Rights Act in her most recent open letter on racism. This is extremely important.
We are in the 21st Century and we were wondering, and when I say 'we', I mean others of us out there who wonder if everyone else out there knows what the significance of the year 2007 is to Black America?
Did you know that our right to VOTE will expire in the year 2007? Seriously! The Voters Rights Act signed in 1965 by Lyndon B. Johnson was just an ACT. It was not made a law.
In 1982, Ronald Reagan amended the Voters Rights Act for another 25 years. Which means that in the year 2007 we could lose the Right to vote!
Does anyone realize that African Americans are the only group of people who require PERMISSION under the United States Constitution to vote! In the year 2007, Congress will once again convene to decide whether or not Blacks should retain the rights to vote (crazy but true).
In order for this to be passed, 38 states will have to approve an extension. This is ludicrous! Not only should the extension be approved, but also the ACT must be made a law. Our right to vote should no longer be up for discussion, review and/or evaluation.
We must contact our Congress-persons, Senators, Alderpersons, etc., to put a stop to this! As bona fide Citizens of the United States, we cannot "drop the ball" on this one! We have come too far to let government make us take such a huge step backward. So please, let us push forward to continue to build the momentum towards gaining equality.
Please pass this onto others, as we are sure that many more individuals are not aware of this. I urge all of you that are able, to contact those in government that have your vote and make them aware of our combined concern for this issue.
One voice!...... One Vote! You cannot complain, if you do not participate.....local, State, & national.....
When I received this one I had no choice but to pass it on. Please do the same.
When I first got this I tried to be very rational about it. Especially because it came from a friend who I respect very much, who is nearing 70 and who remembers the days of Bull Connor and George Wallace and Dr. King and my soul-brother Malcolm X. So I get it. I get why people are worried about this.
But the truth is, from top to bottom, this email is a pack of lies. Vile, hurtful lies. Indeed, it is the worst sort of lie: half-truth that looks real because it's sort of based on some things that are almost true. One thing that's entirely true is that President Reagan did sign a 25 year extension of the Voting Rights Act, and that does expire in 2007 if it's not extended. That much is true. I'm not sure what the hell else to untangle from this racist pack of lies.
You know, a couple of a years ago a prominent black blogger publicly labelled me a racist. I won't give his name or grace him with a link, just because I don't want to reward his bigoted filth with recognition. My crime was I posted something that said, "hey, don't black people annoy you sometimes?" The whole purpose of that, as I explained at the time, was to confront people with their own prejudices, and to note something sad: white people in America today are often afraid (some might even say cowardly) to speak frankly about race issues. Almost on cue, this spoiled little twenty-something black brat, who's never seen a segregated lunch counter in his life, labelled me a racist. I still await the day that I meet this pampered and privileged little suburbanite in person and dare him to say that sh*t to my face.
Here's the blunt truth: the U.S. Constitution recognizes equal rights for all people, regardless of race, and has for some time. Indeed, the right of people to vote regardless of color has been part of the U.S. Constitution since 1870--for over 136 years, in other words. You can read about it here. It's a lie to say that black people need some special dispensation to vote.
What was true is that some states used to abuse that right by cloaking it in special requirements to vote. Some states used to have laws that made you recite parts of the Constitution by heart, or count the number of jellybeans in a jar, in order to be allowed to vote. And they would selectively make only blacks meet those requirements, rather than making them apply to everybody equally. And that's what the Voting Rights Act ended. Condi Rice's father went through that, because southern Democrats would pull that crap on him. That's why she and her father have been lifelong Republicans.
But you know what? It's 2006, not 1965. In the 40-plus years since the Civil Rights Act and Voting Rights act were passed, there have been numerous court cases upholding the right of black people to vote and to have their full civil rights. Also numerous state laws have ended such practices. There are also numerous black elected officials all over the country.
No sane person wants to deny this to any of them. Even if the Voting Rights Act of 1965 expires--which it probably won't, since it will almost certainly be renewed--there's no way in Hell anyone is going to try to deny black people the vote in 2006 or 2007. It's not gonna happen. No freaking way.
Snopes has more to say on it that you should read, but I gotta say more. As a 40 year old white dude, I have a message:
Black people, I'm tired of apologizing to you, and I'm tired of being looked at by you with suspicion. Indeed, I'm gonna talk out of school and just say, I speak for the vast majority of White America here:
The vast majority of us do not hate you. We do not want to put you back on the plantation. We don't want to stop you from dating our daughters or our sons. We don't want to scare you away form the polling booths. We don't want your businesses to fail. We don't want to put your young men in jail. We don't even begrudge you your own music and your own slightly different dress or language. We recognize that you are Americans. Indeed, we recognize that you have made all sorts of amazing contributions to America, including the blues and jazz and Motown and the Harlem Rennaissance, Jimi Hendrix and Ray Charles and Muddy Waters and Aretha Franklin and Diana Ross and Stevie Wonder and Richard Pryor and Eddie Murphie and Lena Horne and Muhammed Ali and Colin Powell and Condie Rice and Dr. King and Mahalia Jackson and and Oprah Winfrey and Malcom X and a whole bunch else besides I haven't even thought of.
Plus you're the only Northerners who still know what grits and and cornbread and collards are.
Enough God damn it. We don't hate you anymore. We love what you give America. I'm 40 years old and my sons don't even know what the Hell I'm talking about when I talk about racism.
Not long ago, a friend we love who is over 60, who remembers the Civil Rights Era very well, asked my wife, "what would you do if your son came home with a black girl?" My wife didn't say what her answer was, but she asked me what I thought. I said, "Hrrm, well, is she smart? Is she funny?" My wife grinned and said, "yeah that's what I said."
God damn it you guys, we love you. You're part of us, you're part of what makes us special. It's over, okay?
Racism is a disease, but one that needs to be stamped out. It's clear that in some areas significant progress has been made, but in others much remains to be done.
I take great exception to this, Dean. Y'all need to come over to my house. ;-) I always have cornmeal in my larder and always have fatback in my refrigerator.
God, I wish that were true, IB Bill. There's plenty of racism still around. Its power has been reduced is all.
But the official policies that supported and encouraged it, that made government a participant and winked at private organizations condoning it, that is gone. So yes racism exists, but its now the personal disease of jerks and not a disorder spread throughout the society and nation.
As I said millions of times, racism is the power to limit, harm, and/or stunt the growth of another race. Based on the way our government is configured, it would be extremely difficult for true racists practicing true racism to run things. Plain and simple. But the average Joe and Jane can be bigoted. Ain't nothin' I can do 'bout that. If your going to get all weird with me because I'm a black dude (a ruggedly handsome one at that) then back to ya! Personally, class has trumped race in America. And in my opinion, classism can be just has devastating as racism. Possibly even more devastating.
I'm Dean's age, I come from a nice middle class white family, both parents were teachers and they raised me to be a strict constitutionalist and a conservative, but not a racist. I wasn't raised to see the color of a person's skin, I was taught early on that the value of a man was in the work he did, not what color he was. I've gone through life with many black friends, dated a few black women, I've even got a Godmother who is black and a lifetime member of the NAACP, but for some people I'm just another white devil, and I'm tired of it.
I'm tired of having to justify myself or my politics to acquaintances and co-workers who are black. I'm tired of being looked at like they enemy when I go into a predominantly black bar just so I can attend a friend's birthday party. I'm tired of there being a double standard, with a lower level of quality being acceptable based on the color of someone's skin. I'm tired of hearing bullshit excuses about why something didn't get done from people who work for me, and then being told not to take action because it could be construed as creating a hostile work environment. In short, I'm pretty fucking tired of it all.
The sad thing is there are a lot of really good people this doesn't apply to, and I try, every day, to remind myself of that. But every time I read about the Reverends Jackson or Sharpton, or I read about another Tawana Brawley-esque case of injustice, or I listen to someone spout crap like that email that Dean posted, I just feel its that much more futile.
Ty: "And in my opinion, classism can be just has devastating as racism. Possibly even more devastating."
Dude, you're being too timid. Because you've really put your finger on the blunt truth of the matter. Contempt for po' white trash is every bit as virulent as contempt for po' black trash. We make fun of the suth'runs just as we make fun of the ebonics speakers. We treat people who grew up poor and hard like they're the bane of our existence rather than our brothers and sisters. We need to stop this.
We have to help them. And by "help them" I don't mean to put them in welfare dependency. I mean treat them with some respect while we give them a hand up.
I think back to a party I went to at a friends house about three years ago. It was another birthday party, this time at her house. Her husband worked hard to put it together, and invited a bunch of us from work as well as a bunch of their long time friends. Joy and Joe are both black, as are most of their long time friends. Those of us from work who showed up were mostly white. I'd known them for a few years and had been over to their house a dozen times or more, so I helped Joe out much of the night, greeting guests, taking coats, directing folks to refreshments and such. When I finally joined the party there I was surprised to see that the people had largely segregated themselves into two groups, and in a short time most of the white people left until there was only me.
That didn't bother me at all, in fact once the "uncomfortable" white folks left the rest of us had one hell of a good time. It's funny (and sad) how people can let their inherent distrust and their personal bigotries keep them from having a good time.
P.S. The Voting Rights Act email that you got is regularly passed along in emails, but many black commentators have already noted how it is untrue.
And we should be allowed to give an Atomic Wedgie (or equivalent) to the idiot who fails to heed that rule.
yes, there are still attitudes and other some stuff that people need to grow out of. But I believe that it'll all just go away with time, especially if we all just leave it alone. Calling attention to race causes more problems at this point than any attempt to "solve racism." Ignore the race hustlers Ignore the mau-mauers. All's gonna be fine. As fine as it needs to be.
Remember the part about no riots. If riots, all bets are off.
--Buster Kilrain
None of us are perfect. I sure ain't, but I deal in individuals.
That isn't just a racial thing. I frequent a biker bar. True, there are some clubbers there, but the greatest majority of the regulars are just folks...even some with SUV's and kids in soccer. But they love Harleys and the lifestyle that goes with it. Pretty often, though, we'll get some newbies in the bar that enter like they're walking into the 7th level of hell...like any second we'll all just turn savage and kill them. And on the flip side, the biker regulars look on the newbies with contempt for being scared and weak.
Sure, it's a race thing. But it's a "clan" thing, too. People of like interests tend to group up, and when someone who's not in the group shows up, suspicions are raised.
I was born, borned or is it born-ded 30 years before you and still had to live in the crappy City of Detroit for nearly 30 years.
And, I ain't about to say:
"God damn it you guys, we love you. You're part of us, you're part of what makes us special. It's over, okay ? "
Yes, I lived during the 1943 race riots and some of the other good ones. We never had a clue to what they were about. But, I remember army tanks down on Hastings, Hancock and Beaubien and Forest back then when we went to visit Gramma. My father wouldn't tell us nothing, just to shut up.
May God bless Henry Ford. He definitely was the best thing to happen to Detroit.
One last thing. The movie, Eight Mile Road was stupidest to the max.
I was wrong. The best thing that happened to Detroit is the Detroit Red Wings.
From your friendly bigot that plans never to return to Detroit to live.
My Dad grew up with Mexicans and went to school with them and the same with my Mother. Dad went to a school on the south side of El Paso and he loved his Mexican friends. My Mother after having very serious hard times growing up with one family member and then another finally found a home in an al girls school that was half mexican. My parents met in a real hard time here in this country just after my Dad came home from the war. They both had pasts that would tear you up. Dad having no father and the one he did just up and left one day leaving my poor grandma to care for three children. She was so poor she had the state take away her first child. Dad did anything he could to help her put food on the table and one day when I finish my book you will find out just how much we Cruea's loved our mexican neighbors and why.
I see how you bring up leaving at fifteen and it still hits me personally real hard. There was a man in my life that I had to go off and have a child out of wedlock and say good-bye to this child when I was three months into being 14. I never brought his name up in the press out of respect for both my parents because I knew they hurt real bad for some of the things us kids had to endure living in El Paso and how they went through such bad times with illness that it ripped them apart. You see some things like that happen in families and they hurt so bad I chose to honor them just for the very fact they loved me.
I married young and when my daughter was born I took off to find a better life for my two children. My two children. You see, I know the first child was not meant to be mine and that is how I always saw it. So you were and always will be my first. I got youa and my daughter out of a horrible situation and then married a man that came home from the Viet-Nam war and was prejudice for many reasons that he will have to tell you about and then he joined the Border patrol where he saw some horrible things that would make people cringe. He was prejudice and he loved us.
Later as my father got on he took on some prejudice due to what he saw happening in his home town of El Paso and how the illegals had got out of control. There was and is a stark difference. I love the men that fought in Viet-Nam and WWII for this country and I love the men that are in the Border Patrol and some see things you will never see or understand. All those people that fought for this country may have some prejudice but it makes them no less that n anybody ever and period.
I knew knew prejudice until the man I spoke of above moved us out of a compassionate transfer. The first I ever saw prejudice was when I lived in Chicago back in the early 70's and it scared me. I had only kno9wn of prejudice when I lived on 83rd. St. with my children on the south side of Chicago. My husband then became an undercover agent and once again put his life on the line. He was prejudice in ways people that understand it back then until time began to show us we did not need to feel that way.
We are talking about era's before you were born and era's of me growing up. yep, we even had crackers and milk sometimes when I was a little girl but you know what? We loved our parents and even when my Mother took sick and could no longer care for us, We loved her and would never say of her that she had profound mental illness. It was the era and that is prejudice right there to call a parent mental. Depression is a beast and it can grow like a cancer just like misinformation.
What we heard when we were 14-, 15 and up until we matured we kept inside us. This era is all out there and things are not in the closet as they were. I liked that time when things were kept out of respect in families and especially no comparrisons made as to how this race or that race had it harder. We all have it hard.
I have be3en outspoken regarding Legal Immigration and that does not mean I am at all a racist. I believe the black people are good people too and they had it hard. I really can not think of many races that came to this great country that did not suffrer. They came her for a bettere way of life and they have found it.
We are in a War again and I chose to honor those that gave me this great country to raise my children the very damn best that I could given my prejudice of having, "depression", Yes that alone is a prejudice and so is being a beautiful woman as I am. Being beautiful has it hurts I can not begin to tell you about. I was on Joe Gandleman's site and the discussion was of the above things I am including. Having a child out of wed-lock is still a nasty prejudice so Imagine having that happen when you are just 14 and were raped but because you were beautiful and mature due to rasing a little sisiter so my Mom could be helped in a mental hospital. Do you know the prejudice I heard?
Prejudice is an ugly beast but we can do a lot better to recognize it is not just black, or mexican, or gay, or muslim.
People need to grow and mature when they look back on the era's of this country. For she is beautiful and she is flawed and I will not apologize for being ignorant in my era. I will not apologize that I want this country to grow up in all prejudices and realize that will take time. There is a right way to be a part of this country and I saw where Val wrote the words to our National Anthem in English with the Hispanic title. That brough tears to my eyes because Val surely has his woes and stories of his life and his struggles but he honored the Untied States.
When we knock down our past, we knock down what made each and every one of us a free nation, we knock down how hard it was to get here and we knock down our own darn parents with out looking into their eyes and the way their eyes cry and why they cry and where they were and how far they came. So my stuggle was damn hard and I got stares for the beauty that I was. Prejudice is ugly but open your hearts and eyes and stop making it just a color.
My grandmother, God Bless Her! She had a horrible life right here on this soil and carried the United States Flag into every Rebecca's meeting until the day she died. She never found her child that was taken because she was so poor. She told me from the time I was knee high to a grasshopper how to make a delicious stew. It had every color of the rainbow in it, the spices came from all around the world.
So wehn you see a beautiful white woman know that behind her she has tears. When you see a beautiful black woman, you will also see her tears.
This post just got my dander up more than ever before because I love mexicans and I love black people but I am old enough to remember why things happened and to try to uphold many, many prejudices.
Now I'm back in the very integrated city, and I think about racism. However, it's mostly in the, "Gee, if I were racist, this would be driving me nuts..." It's a little obnoxious, actually, because I'm not getting tense, I'm not freaking out, but all the time there's a little voice saying that skin color matters in some places. Stupid self-reflection. Sometimes it gets a little recursive.
(One of the things about being in a very integrated city is the types of "races" you run across. As an example, I was recently in a play with a father and two daughters where the father was pale black— coffee with a LOT of cream— and his daughters were black-Filipino. Great voices on those three, and the younger girl is very into science fiction, so we had some great conversations...)